She's Come Undone.
“Let’s just say I’ve lost interest in her recovery. I’d rather watch her tear through an orphanage.” – Katherine
It’s been a week since we left Mystic Falls to get sleazy in the Big Easy, but our vacation was short lived. You see, as much as some folks are ready to jump the TVD ship and go party it up in New Orleans with The Originals, there are still a few tiny loose threads up in Virginia that need to be tied – namely, Stefan and Damon trying to torture humanity back into Elena, Silas’ desire to unleash supernatural hell on earth, and the fact that Matt’s, like, totally failing Senior year, guys. Priorities – these kids got ‘em.
(Not-So) Empty Elena
But now’s not the time to argue definitions. Stefan, Eyeballs, Caroline, and Matt are determined to get Elena’s humanity back because, let’s face it, without it she’s kind of a total slunt. When starving her just makes her cranky, setting her on fire just makes her smarter, and leaving her in a room with Katherine works about as well as anyone expected it to, they decide to use Matt as one last piece of collateral damage in the fight for Elena’s humanity. Who knew that if they would’ve just snapped Matt’s neck 4 episodes ago Elena’s humanity would come back, everyone would still be friends, and things would just be a little bit less stressful in general?
You gotta give it to Elena, though. She fought the good fight. Without any pesky feelings getting in the way, she was able to read each of her Interveners like a book, and then turn around and throw that book at their faces. But now, Elena’s got her humanity back and the full weight of her assholery has come crashing down like a fat kid doing a cannonball. Let’s hope her plan to kill Katherine is just a side-effect of coming off an anti-humanity high, because no. Just no.
Unfortunately, being a wonderful, precious idiot doesn’t protect people from getting their ass stalked and staked by a shape-shifting immortal who wants someone to open a portal to hell for him. I’m going to be completely honest: I have never been more terrified during this show than watching Caroline desperately try and get away from Silas, lock her doors, and protect her mom. That may be because I have frequently recurring nightmares about someone trying to get into my house and me not being able to find all of the doors and windows to lock them, but it could also be because I’m a huge chicken shit and I’m afraid of the dark. Take your pick.
But kudos to Caroline for being so willing to help her friends that she’d take an imaginary stake to the stomach rather than give up Bonnie’s whereabouts. Also, for making flash cards. Precious.
I can’t tell if Bonnie is a genius or stupid, but she’s definitely a badass chick. Bonnie has a plan to harness the power of her dead relative, open the portal, kill Silas (I think?), give Katherine immortality, and still make it down the aisle for graduation. Is it going to work? Hell no, because this is TVD and it will probably end in horrible tragedy for everyone, but I appreciate her tenacity.
She’s Come Undone
- When Caroline snapped Elena’s neck, I cheered. You don’t steal a girl’s prom dress, dick. That’s like, the rules of feminism.
- Katherine’s sheer glee at getting the opportunity to torture Elena is how I think I’d feel if Ryan Gosling proposed to me, handed me a basket of puppies and a gallon of sweet tea, and told me I never had to work ever again. Not like I’ve, like, thought that through or anything.
- That massive-assive CW logo is the most obnoxious thing on TVD since Professor Shane’s neck beard.
If you'd like to hear more of my feelings in 140 characters or less, get at me on Twitter - @LadyFantastic28!
Rebekah is freakin HAWT!!! Elena, is pretty hawt. Caroline is SMOKIN HAWT!! And Bonnie.....well.....ehhhhh