The Vampire Diaries"Memorial"
"I say rip off the proverbial bandaid and let it bleed. You're a vampire, Elena. Be a vampire." - Damon
Way back in Season 1, Alaric Saltzman: Vampire Hunter was introduced and poured sheer terror into the eyeballs of our little baby vamps. That lasted a grand total of, like, 30 seconds before Alaric wussed out completely and was like, "JK, guys, I luv u all. BFFL." And they all lived [semi-]happily ever after until his [semi-]death. Now that Muffy the Vampire Slayer, aka Connor Jordan, has arrived in town with some heavy artillery and pretty sick ideas on how to lure the vamps out of the woodwork, (Shanking the dead preacher's daughter and letting her blood drip around the church as bait? C'mon, bro, Jesus is watching!) how long will it take our heroes to come up with the brilliant plan to just, like, invite him out for drinks at the grille and really get to know him, since it totes worked for Alaric? Either that or they're going to make Bonnie: Certified Problem Solver sleep with him until he promises to stop hunting, because that's how this show rolls.
Eyeballs McGee (Damon)
"Am I wearing the 'I blew up the council' t-shirt? Why does everyone keep asking me?"
Mr. McGee had the snark on point this episode, and was more exasperated with the idiots surrounding him than whiny like he's been in the past. In true Eyeballs fashion, he completely scoffs at Stefans idea of taking a night off to grieve, because, HELLO! Muffy is trying to annihilate their entire circle of friends! So what does he do? He... takes the night off to grieve by downing a bottle of booze and rambling semi-incoherently at Alaric's headstone. Sometimes, Damon reminds me of the homeless people you pass on the streets downtown who are drunkenly yelling at an imaginary foe about something that kinda sorta makes sense if you tilt your head a little bit, and that horrid haircut doesn't help in the slightest.
- "A lot of people died, and we're having sex." - Caroline "It's grief sex. It's healthy." - Tyler
- G, my 23-year-old male cousin/roommate was "forced" to sit down and watch the show with me this week. Here's his two line review: "There's too many WTF moments in this show. I don't like it," he says, as he rewinds the DVR to watch a scene over again. What's that Shakespeare line about doth protesting too much? He's a teenage girl at heart.
- I know they're trying to be secretive and suspenseful by not actually telling us why the preacher blew up half of the town council, but I wish they would've given us a little bit more than a handwritten letter to his daughter that flashed on screen for 30 seconds. These bitches assume I actually know how to read, and it's hurtful.
I'll get to work coming up with a name for our little gang of blood-suckers, but knowing me it will probably end up making them sound like a boy band. Though, is that really a bad thing? I'm kinda torn on Muffy: Vampire Slayer... he's hot, but I feel like his head leads me to believe his body should be buffer than it is, if that makes any sense. I mean, dude's ripped, but he's skinny ripped, and I keep wanting him to be like, The Rock or something.
Also, all I gathered from the last sentence of your comment is that you want the characters to start battling babies and I am SO ON BOARD.
So basically, on top of selling out her Grams' soul for the Scooby gang (we have to find a name for the MF, we cannot keep on ripping BVTS off), Bonnie will now have to whore herself out to save her friends? SMH... but the brotha is soooooooooo fine though (LOL).
Anyway! This show is becoming too predictive and redundant again. We need something like new villains born from IVF-surrogacy by example: (vampire+werewolf) embryo implanted in a witch.