Ivy

Derek was in prime Derek-form last night. The weirdest thing he did was go into the wardrobe closet and pretty much masturbate to Karen and Ivy while fantasizing about them and touching Rebecca's clothes. Creeeeeepsville. The lamest thing he did was tell Karen this right before she went on stage, "Whatever happens next don't ever forget you're a star and I do understand love." So, now you're in LOVE with Karen? Oh, pshaw! Derek -- Marilyn of the Week It's a total tie!

Ivy's Episode Guide

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Please join me in ringing a hearty “welcome back” bell for our favorite upstairs/downstairs crew. Like the rest of you, I spent the last year sticking pins into my Dan Stevens voodoo doll, but it was time to face our grief along with the rest of the Crawleys.

C+

width: 310px;;">Kiss My Marilyn Ring, Bitches It would have to be unlucky episode 13 that turned everyone into their worst selves. Everything felt wrong last night. From the motley crew leaving for Boston from Grand Central (um, Metro North goes to mid-CT not all the way to Beantown, you need to go to Penn Station for THAT) to Dev asking Karen to marry him (um, don't you know she's in TECH! She can't get engaged during TECH!), it was all wrong. I'm blaming the number 13 and praying 14 brings us better things. IvyC+ 13 brought Ivy back to her pathetic, lovelorn, un-confident self.

A

Julia --


width: 310px;;">Creep-dropper & Horsehead 4Eva Everyone's role was clearly defined last night on Smash. Ivy hulked out on Prednisone. Tom acted like her creepy father-lover. Karen beguiled a crowd of tweens. Julia & Michael slutted it up. And, Eileen became the most uncomfortable granny hipster of all time. Julia & MichaelB+ We learned some important things about Julia and Swifty last night. Julia wears grandma pantalones that go up to her "real" waist and they both like to have sex with their pants on. I know it's NBC, but come on! Show us butts at least.

B+

width: 225px;;">"I'm doing the splits. Or is it a split?" Last night's Smash was a tale of two cities. A B-List party at Derek's apartment and an "intervention" meets dance-off at a dive bar across town. The dichotomy of the parties matched nicely with the growing tension between our two Marilyns. Ivy pulled no punches the entire ep, but from the looks of Karen's rendition of "Rumor Has It", she's ready to claw her way back to the top. Yay! Adele and cat fights! KarenA- Anyone else love that Karen is JUST like Maggie from "A Chorus Line"?

A

That's one big duck mouth. They cast Marilyn! That was easy. So, what are we doing for the rest of the season? More Karen fantasizing while she's singing? More adopting a baby from China? More sleeping with chorus girls? More Tom being an insane annoying psychopath? Still sounds like a great show and the plot of episode 2. KarenB+ She worked so hard this week with her knocky knees and weird bad shorts. But, our naive cutie did blow off Dev on his special Deputy Mayor dinner night. Is Karen starting to turn into a career hungry ego maniac? I hope so, it will make her a LOT more interesting.

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